Monday, August 31, 2009

IYTI Vancouver 2

IYTI Vancouver, Canada II
Reused and Recycled, trash into treasure
(August 2009)

held on Saturday August 29th on the steps of the Vancouver Art Gallery hosted by jerm IX, ninja IX & Indigo.

photos property of IYTI Vancouver

paste-ups (mostly eyebeam guy)

construction lamps

canvas on wooden poles

Friday, August 28, 2009

dogs should always wear safety glasses

Last week we were chilling at this park and we met this kid George, he's from Bulgaria. Super nice kid, he helped us clean out this gnarly little fountain/bowl/skatepark called "the bone" in Lynnwood.
Here's a piece of a conversation we had

George from Bulgaria- "I saw a dog jump into those woods and he poked his eye on a stick!"

Me- "that's why dogs should be required to wear safety glasses at all times"

It's the truth!
Dogs think that they are indestructible and just go running into whatever and wherever they want... c'mon dogs!! get some safety equipment! You're driving up heath care costs for the rest of us.. and just because you have four legs doesn't mean you're better than everyone else.


no one likes to see a dog with an eye patch on.

a word of advice to the kids on razor scooters at the Duvall skatepark


I'm not a big fan at all of those razor scooters,
in fact I think they are completely ridiculous.
Razors scooters will rot your teeth and brains out... THAT'S A FACT!
We live in America and you can ride whatever you want,
I fully understand that.

Kids please!!
don't leave your razor scooters in the bottom of the bowl!

#1. I had to carve around a bunch of junk left down there AKA helmets and scooters.

#2. The mom of one of you little squirts picked up one of the scooters out of boredom.. THEN STARTED SHREDDING THE GNAR IN THAT BOWL!

She rode better than all four of you kids put together.. that had to have hurt your egos a little bit.
So, next time.. to save some embarrassment to you.. keep that razor scooter away from your hot mom, so she doesn't show you all up again.


Wednesday, August 26, 2009

lucky pennies!

I found three lucky pennies while I was out skating today!
count 'em.. 1.. 2.. THREE!!

you know what that means!


Monday, August 24, 2009

Friday, August 21, 2009

thee friendliest cat in America

Scene One, Take One


I approach, walking down a dimly lit Seattle sidewalk (uneven and gaped). I've had a couple of "road sodas" so I don't pay attention to how warped the sidewalk is.. so, why did I even mention it (maybe to set the scene)
I see a strange wandering cat ahead
It's a cute cat

I don't think I've ever met a cat that isn't cute, so why did I mention that too (probably to introduce the main character).

I start petting said cat and talking to it.
This cat is naturally comfortable sitting on my lap, it's out of control
It makes me kind of jealous, I wish I was that mellow about stuff.
That I could trust and let go of everything as freely as awesome cat does.
Cat starts to get crazy and climbing up all over me, even up on my shoulders.. this is one friendly cat.
So friendly in fact,
I would say it is... THE FRIENDLIEST CAT IN AMERICA!!!

YES!! thank you friendly cat! YOU RULE!!
keep doing it

why the secret agenda to keep me from drinking coffee today?

I don't get it... all day!!!! I could not get a damn cup of coffee down my throat, one thing after another.
Let me drink me COFFEEE!!!!
I hopes to drink some in peace tomorrow.

The way I drink coffee requires safety equipment.

Intensity level at 100%

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

pacify yourself in the cold waters of the Pacific Ocean

it's easy and you are required to love it.

step 1.
get your sweet ass to Golden Gardens in Ballard

step 2.
don't forget to stop at the 7-11 and grab some beverage

step 3.
drink some of the beverage and soak up some gorgeous sunshine

step 4.
prepare to pacify yourself

step 5.
get in the water and remember.. it is the Puget Sound...
get ready to get cold.
(the trick is to get in up to your knees, then barge it.. don't stand around talking about how cold it is or you will never commit)

step 6.
float in the saltwater, let some currents grab you.. swim, stay afloat.
clear your mind and drift.

step 7.
chill out in the drink for about 20 minutes.

step 8.
you are pacified

step 9.
come back into the beach, preferably Navy Seal style.

step 10.
let the euphoria wash over your soul.

oh yeah!


Monday, August 17, 2009

Numbers Monkey (retail)

Traits of the numbers monkey

*Numbers Monkey will only talk about how the company numbers and money are doing, Numbers monkey does not have time for anything else.

*Numbers Monkey has very weak sense of humor and makes up for that by overcompensating in the arrogance department.

*At times, the Numbers Monkey seems more robot than human.

*Numbers Monkey does not make sense most of the time, and gets very annoyed when you do not understand its nonsense.

*Numbers Monkey tends to be a little slow and easily distracted.

*Numbers Monkey always wants to tell everyone how to make customers buy more products.

*Numbers Monkeys are socially awkward, this is a result of viewing people (coworkers and customers) as numbers and not as human beings.

*Numbers Monkeys usually have some kind of briefcase as an accessory. Contrary to popular belief, there are not any business papers in that briefcase.. try peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Numbers Monkey loves briefcase PB&J!

*Numbers Monkey may seem friendly at times, BEWARE! Numbers Monkey is still a wild animal and cannot truly be tamed.

*Always compliment Numbers Monkey on their penny loafers.

Be on the lookout, this recession has brought the Numbers Monkey out in force.
We have destroyed its natural habitat and it is slowly moving into the city and suburbs.
Be vigilant!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Vital 5

Today started out with a super fun session at Green Lake skate park (someday I'll remember to get pics at an actual skate park, I get too excited and forget to take pics).

I didn't know if I was going to make it to the new Vital 5 grant/preformance piece.
"arbitrary art grant in art dealing"
I did make it, I walked a 36 by 48 inch painting down 15 blocks in the pouring rain.. and it was awesome!
(drinking a couple beers and having an Ipod in my ears gets me through almost anything)
I talked to a lot of great people, got to check out some incredible art, and one little pygmy bear masquerading as a short-haired pomeranian (complete with a florescent orange coat).

I included a photo of the painting that I hauled down, it's from a couple years ago. I wanted to bring something big and dark, it fit the mood of the sky today. good times!
check out for more info.


c'mon little blogspot.. you can do it!!

This is an open letter to my little blogspot.

C'mon blogspot... quit being so elusive.
Why are you blocking me out?
I can't view you anymore from my personal computer.
Did I neglect you?
Did you get a virus?

I gots lots of posts to put up, how can I win you back?
This is getting crazy... talk to me, we can work it out.
I can go to every other site in the vast, entire cyberspace... except blogspot.. WHY!?? I ask you WHY?!!

I don't know what I did wrong, come back blogspot.. I'm begging you.
Come back.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


This is how I felt all day today, slowed down manic euphoria.
So hard to concentrate, brain full of clouds and cotton balls.
I couldn't even form sentences, I did a lot of mumbling.


Damn, what a fun day!

Monday, August 10, 2009

"things I'm thankful for" gratitude lists

Recently I've been making lists of things that I'm thankful for, it helps to keep me stoked on what is going on every day and to keep in check with how incredible it is to be alive.. and also to prevent myself from turning into too much of a whiny bastard.

I was getting my car's oils changed at Jiffy Lube last week, I was all giddy/manic from powering through a couple cups of black coffee and being up a little too early (11am)... this is the perfect combo for making lists.

An elderly couple came into the waiting room at Jiffy Lube, they sat down next to me.
I could feel the elderly woman glancing over to peek at what I was writing.. the glances quickly became a full-blown, drool inducing stare.

At the very moment that I was going to write "I'm thankful this list is interesting enough that the woman next to me wants to read it"....I got called out by the Jiffy Lube guy, my car was done and I was out of there. Sorry you didn't make the list random lady.

gratitude lists are definite good times!

Sunday, August 9, 2009

urinal fruit fly

I was in this restroom earlier today and I saw a fruit fly hovering around the urinal, he was having a great time. The problem is.. there is no fruit in the urinal.. c'mon fruit fly, get it together!

Either change your name to urinal fly.. or get the hell out of the urinal!

Do your job and go find some fruit!

I forgot to make a bad drawing for this post :(

Friday, August 7, 2009

ohh, look what I did

I spilled beer on the Pinguino/Starhead zine last night at Pioneer Square Saloon.
I spotted an abandoned beer, keep an eye on it for about 15 minutes, then we all got up to move. golden moment.
snatched up that beer and emptied into my glass... which caused a chain reaction of beer foam.
beer foam then rose up and took its aggression out on the helpless little, in-progress zine.

Pinguino/Starhead zine=beer scratch-n-sniff zine


I don't write so good..

I get an F-
but, who cares..

I'm going to turn that F- upside down and get a solid D-

just like I used to do in school.

piece of bread with peanut butter on it.. DIVER!

I was making some peanut butter and honey sandwiches this morning. One of the pieces of bread decided to do an "escape from prison" dive.. he jumped off my stove, did two backflips and landed peanut butter side down on the kitchen floor.

The judges gave him an 8.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

the buffalo

When I first made this little dude, he was a symbol of something pure that needs to always remember to stay pure.
The buffalo were driven to near extinction by the Europeans to exhaust the Native Americans food supply. This animal that freely roamed the plains, killed to be killed.. pointless death.

I see everything in the individual, all our struggles through life.. the good and the bad. All of it is good, life is incredible.. and it is our responsibility to always see that.
The buffalo is a metaphor for the pure emotions and innocent way that we see the world as a child. When you are a little kid, you don't know sarcasm, bitterness or anger.. not the same way that many adults see it.
Life isn't easy, and the world can be cold.. if you aren't careful, it will chip away at that inner light and all those pure emotions that you experienced as a kid will be driven to extinction.
The buffalo is a visual reminder to always be a kid at heart, to never give that up.... and, if it has left you in any way.. to seek it back out, it's never too late. Life is gorgeous and the world is beautiful.. any of us can do anything, it's important to always remember that. You deserve to be happy and have fun every day, life is a journey filled with incredible adventures.

The buffalo symbolizes much more now.. from just simply comfort, to conviction, inner strength, pure love and life.
It means whatever you want it to mean.

Life is too long and too short to not live it to it's fullest.
You have unlimited potential, you can do anything... you make it happen.

Tuesday, August 4, 2009


Yesterday I won "The Golden Gardens Stupidest Sunburn In History Award"... I am so honored.

I had sunblock all over me, except my feets.
We hung out down at Golden Gardens for five hours yesterday and when we weren't swimming out in the cold Puget Sound (pacify yourself), we were sitting on the beach in the sand. I had my feet half covered in the sand all day. I ended up getting sunburned from the very bottom part of my shins to the middle of my feet.

YAY!! I won!
Christmas came early this year

Monday, August 3, 2009

petting cats on the street=mini-makeout sesh

I was walking to the lake a couple days ago and I spotted a cute cat up ahead on the sidewalk. This was one of those super friendly cats, I reached down and pet the little dude. So, I pet said cat for just a second, just a bunch of fast pets.. then I started walking away. I looked back and the cat was still looking around with that "mmm, that felt good, what was that?" look in it's eyes.

petting a cat (cat's perspective) is equal to making out with a person (human perspective)

Petting a random cat on the street is just like making out with a person on the street. The human world and the cat world have obvious differences... but, if both our worlds were the same my theory would be sound.

The make-out sesh could be switched with a hug.
So, if human culture was very much more "hug-based" we would feel more like cats feel. Cats get affection all day through getting pet. Imagine a society of people walking around hugging each other all the time, whether the people know each other or not. hmmmmmmm...I may just be going completely insane.

anyway...hugging and making out with people, and petting cats all equal lots of fun.

Saturday, August 1, 2009

hunger vs. sleep

I got home late last night after MNSS2K9.. aka Marathon Night Swim Sesh 2009. I was super tired and I was HUNGRY... I thought I was going to have to resort to a game I play in my mind called "hunger vs. sleep". Whichever one is stronger at the time wins, usually sleep takes the gold. I also had to get a shower to remove all the sick lake sludge and parasites off me, which added more to the dilemma... it almost turned into "cleanliness vs. hunger vs. sleep" and that gets way too complicated.

I found a solution to all of it..

I ended up eating a turkey sandwich in the shower, and it was AWEZOME!!!

I've drank coffee or a beer in the shower, but this was the first time I broke the barrier of actually eating solid foodstuffs.
I'm definitely not going to make it a habit, but it really saved me last night. Multitasking.
I'll most likely stick to my old policy:
liquids in the shower only.

good times!